Irreverent Prayers
Talking to God When You?re Seriously Sick
Author Elizabeth Felicetti & Samantha Vincent-Alexander ISBN 9780802882639 Binding Trade Paper Publisher WM B. Eerdmans Publishing Company Publication Date July 02, 2024 Size 127 x 203 mm
Two pastors share their experiences with serious illness—and their candid, darkly humorous prayers for making it through. Samantha Vincent-Alexander almost died from a septic leg infection
Two pastors share their experiences with serious illness—and their candid, darkly humorous prayers for making it through.
Samantha Vincent-Alexander almost died from a septic leg infection. Elizabeth Felicetti underwent aggressive treatment for both breast and lung cancer in the space of a few months—and then the cancer came back. As Episcopal priests, they know well the typical prayers offered in times like these. But when you’re seriously sick, you need more than psalms and sentimentality.
You need to tell God how you really feel.
With vulnerability and wry humor, Felicetti and Vincent-Alexander share the prayers they wish they had when they were ill: thanksgiving for one-size-fits-all hospital underwear, curses against Tylenol, frustrated appeals when well-wishers call you brave or inspiring. At once faithful and brutally honest, these prayers offer readers a more candid way of communicating with the God who understands human suffering with an incarnational intimacy.
Talking to God when you’re fighting serious illness can feel impossible. But God can bear our doubt, anger, anxiety, and grief. This unconventional prayerbook helps readers access a deeper relationship with God in raw times—and offers them a place of solidarity and spiritual rest.
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Samantha Vincent-Alexander almost died from a septic leg infection. Elizabeth Felicetti underwent aggressive treatment for both breast and lung cancer in the space of a few months—and then the cancer came back. As Episcopal priests, they know well the typical prayers offered in times like these. But when you’re seriously sick, you need more than psalms and sentimentality.
You need to tell God how you really feel.
With vulnerability and wry humor, Felicetti and Vincent-Alexander share the prayers they wish they had when they were ill: thanksgiving for one-size-fits-all hospital underwear, curses against Tylenol, frustrated appeals when well-wishers call you brave or inspiring. At once faithful and brutally honest, these prayers offer readers a more candid way of communicating with the God who understands human suffering with an incarnational intimacy.
Talking to God when you’re fighting serious illness can feel impossible. But God can bear our doubt, anger, anxiety, and grief. This unconventional prayerbook helps readers access a deeper relationship with God in raw times—and offers them a place of solidarity and spiritual rest.
Foreword Reviews
“A cheeky text whose entries demonstrate the healing power of brave, honest faith.”
“Prayers that emerge from pain, confusion, and life-threatening realities sound irreverent, even defiant. Yet in the paradoxical mystery of divine-human conversation, prayers prayed on these paths of misery become hallowed, precisely because they are not dressed up. Having suffered and prayed there too, Felicetti and Vincent-Alexander not only model what is possible and permitted in prayer, but also show how it is also authentic praise and petition. These prayers are for patients and families in acute pain and fear—body, mind, and spirit—as well as for those laboring in the trenches of medicine: nurses, doctors, surgeons, lab technicians, and office managers.”
—Laura M. Fabrycky, author of Keys to Bonhoeffer’s Haus
“Searing and intimate, astute and funny, Irreverent Prayers is a profound gift to people facing illness, those who love them, and all of us fragile mortals.”
—Shea Tuttle, author of Exactly as You Are: The Life and Faith of Mister Rogers
“This is the book I will reach for when I am in pain. This is the book I will gift to those in pain. Irreverent Prayers offers real, holy, and healing prayers.”
—Teri Ott, editor and publisher of The Presbyterian Outlook
“Irreverent Prayers will be a useful volume for many who struggle, especially when physical discomfort makes ‘comforting prayers’ anything but that. If you have ever read through the psalter and given thanks for the range of emotions there, these prayers may give voice to allow you to speak your struggles to God.”
—Scott Gunn, executive director of Forward Movement
“Here is a book of prayers for the sick like none I have ever seen, written bluntly but tenderly, speaking aloud the confusion, rage, and loneliness—and even loss of faith—that can be brought on by the brutality of serious illness and hospitalization. Felicetti and Vincent-Alexander know all too well the valley of the shadow of death from their own experience and offer us their honest witness and courageous words as a bridge for anyone longing to express to God (and perhaps also other people) what this depth of pain and suffering is like, and how on earth to pray about it when a loving God seems powerless to help.”
—Heidi Haverkamp, spiritual director and author of Holy Solitude: Lenten Reflections with Saints, Hermits, Prophets, and Rebels.
“The experience of life-threatening illness is an isolating one in a world that teaches that through hard work and a positive attitude, perfect health is your reward. In this book of prayers, Samantha and Elizabeth knock down the silos that keep us quiet about the reality of being human. Their faithful, sometimes funny, always sincere messages to God reveal that while vulnerability is our lot, it can be the force that brings us closer together to one another and to God. This book is a gift.”
—Megan L. Castellan, Canon to the Ordinary, Diocese of Central New York
“If the prayers that Elizabeth Felicetti and Samantha Vincent-Alexander have to offer from the vulnerable space of serious illness are irreverent, I don't want to be reverent. Honest, raw, and real is how I imagine God hopes we speak to her, and the words of this prayer book are exactly that, giving form—occasionally edged in wry humor—to the varied emotions associated with being seriously sick. An invaluable tool for anyone experiencing illness, either for themselves or as a pastoral caregiver.”
—Meghan Murphy-Gill, author of The Sacred Life of Bread: Uncovering the Mystery of an Ordinary Loaf
“All the words you’ve been wanting to say to God when you’re sick but didn’t know you could. This book encourages us all to pray freely and—more importantly—to worship authentically when our bodies are unwell.”
—Lamar Hardwick, author of How Ableism Fuels Racism: Dismantling the Hierarchy of Bodies in the Church
“Equal parts cheeky and vulnerable, Irreverent Prayers offers a refreshing vision of honest engagement with God in the face of significant illness and pain. Written by and for the ‘seriously sick,’ this book is a vital resource for everyone exactly because it’s animated by first-hand experiences.”
—Bethany McKinney Fox, author of Disability and the Way of Jesus: Holistic Healing in the Gospels and the Churc
View Review quote
“A cheeky text whose entries demonstrate the healing power of brave, honest faith.”
“Prayers that emerge from pain, confusion, and life-threatening realities sound irreverent, even defiant. Yet in the paradoxical mystery of divine-human conversation, prayers prayed on these paths of misery become hallowed, precisely because they are not dressed up. Having suffered and prayed there too, Felicetti and Vincent-Alexander not only model what is possible and permitted in prayer, but also show how it is also authentic praise and petition. These prayers are for patients and families in acute pain and fear—body, mind, and spirit—as well as for those laboring in the trenches of medicine: nurses, doctors, surgeons, lab technicians, and office managers.”
—Laura M. Fabrycky, author of Keys to Bonhoeffer’s Haus
“Searing and intimate, astute and funny, Irreverent Prayers is a profound gift to people facing illness, those who love them, and all of us fragile mortals.”
—Shea Tuttle, author of Exactly as You Are: The Life and Faith of Mister Rogers
“This is the book I will reach for when I am in pain. This is the book I will gift to those in pain. Irreverent Prayers offers real, holy, and healing prayers.”
—Teri Ott, editor and publisher of The Presbyterian Outlook
“Irreverent Prayers will be a useful volume for many who struggle, especially when physical discomfort makes ‘comforting prayers’ anything but that. If you have ever read through the psalter and given thanks for the range of emotions there, these prayers may give voice to allow you to speak your struggles to God.”
—Scott Gunn, executive director of Forward Movement
“Here is a book of prayers for the sick like none I have ever seen, written bluntly but tenderly, speaking aloud the confusion, rage, and loneliness—and even loss of faith—that can be brought on by the brutality of serious illness and hospitalization. Felicetti and Vincent-Alexander know all too well the valley of the shadow of death from their own experience and offer us their honest witness and courageous words as a bridge for anyone longing to express to God (and perhaps also other people) what this depth of pain and suffering is like, and how on earth to pray about it when a loving God seems powerless to help.”
—Heidi Haverkamp, spiritual director and author of Holy Solitude: Lenten Reflections with Saints, Hermits, Prophets, and Rebels.
“The experience of life-threatening illness is an isolating one in a world that teaches that through hard work and a positive attitude, perfect health is your reward. In this book of prayers, Samantha and Elizabeth knock down the silos that keep us quiet about the reality of being human. Their faithful, sometimes funny, always sincere messages to God reveal that while vulnerability is our lot, it can be the force that brings us closer together to one another and to God. This book is a gift.”
—Megan L. Castellan, Canon to the Ordinary, Diocese of Central New York
“If the prayers that Elizabeth Felicetti and Samantha Vincent-Alexander have to offer from the vulnerable space of serious illness are irreverent, I don't want to be reverent. Honest, raw, and real is how I imagine God hopes we speak to her, and the words of this prayer book are exactly that, giving form—occasionally edged in wry humor—to the varied emotions associated with being seriously sick. An invaluable tool for anyone experiencing illness, either for themselves or as a pastoral caregiver.”
—Meghan Murphy-Gill, author of The Sacred Life of Bread: Uncovering the Mystery of an Ordinary Loaf
“All the words you’ve been wanting to say to God when you’re sick but didn’t know you could. This book encourages us all to pray freely and—more importantly—to worship authentically when our bodies are unwell.”
—Lamar Hardwick, author of How Ableism Fuels Racism: Dismantling the Hierarchy of Bodies in the Church
“Equal parts cheeky and vulnerable, Irreverent Prayers offers a refreshing vision of honest engagement with God in the face of significant illness and pain. Written by and for the ‘seriously sick,’ this book is a vital resource for everyone exactly because it’s animated by first-hand experiences.”
—Bethany McKinney Fox, author of Disability and the Way of Jesus: Holistic Healing in the Gospels and the Churc
Elizabeth Felicetti is the rector of St. David’s Episcopal Church in Richmond, Virginia, and the author of Unexpected Abundance: The Fruitful Lives of Women without Children.
Samantha Vincent-Alexander is the rector of Christ Episcopal Church in Philadelphia and a coauthor of Grace in the Rearview Mirror.
View Biographical note
Samantha Vincent-Alexander is the rector of Christ Episcopal Church in Philadelphia and a coauthor of Grace in the Rearview Mirror.
Table of Contents
Introduction
One Sick Story: Breasts and Breath
Another Sick Story: In the ICU with the Desert Mothers
1. Pain and Anger
2. Blood and Breath
3. Waiting, Wandering, and Wondering
4. Hospitals
5. Well-Wishers and Caregivers
6. Aftermath
7. Relapse
Acknowledgments